How to not give in

Shelly · **How to not give in -** 10-12-08, 07:19 AM

Okay so I have 2 children, my son will be 10 and my daughter will be 8 , both in November.

My children are spoilt, they ask for something I say No and they go and do it anyway grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
Or If I say No, they whinge and carry on till I get so annoyed and give in and give them what they want.
I am not talking about buying stuff at shops and stuff, just small little things like ................. mummy can I have another packet of chips, No you just had a packet an hour ago, oooh but mummy im so hungry carry on carry on carry on blah blah blah, oh just get a packet of chips and shhhhh.

So what is your advice as to how to I stand my ground and not give in to their sulking.

sending them to their rooms has not helped and talking rationally has not helped.

**♥ Clare ♥** · 10-12-08, 09:50 AM

Move the things they are likely to want to a place that they cannot see or reach so they don't know if there are any there or not.

Try distracting them when they first ask for something they cannot have buy giving them a task to do, often they forget what it was they wanted if they get engrossed in something else.

Teach your child the importance of the word “No.” Don’t waffle when your child acts up as a way to avoid a confrontation or to stop a tantrum. Children are brilliant at knowing how to get what they want from you. If you hesitate and give in even once when a tantrum starts, they have learned that tantrums will get them whatever they need in the future. If your child is in full tantrum mode, tell them, “You can’t always get everything you want.” Follow up by removing them from the situation or isolating them temporarily until they calm down. Be firm and consistent and your child will learn that having a tantrum will not get their needs met.

Кιттзη · 10-12-08, 10:11 AM

sell ur children on e-bay! then use the money u have to hav an exotic holiday!

~Angel~ · 10-12-08, 11:57 AM

I agree with what Clare said. Or if they ask for something tell them no then make them go do something like cleaning or other job around the house.Say NO and walk away don't give the chance to ask again to change your mind. If it is mostly snacks they do it with try a week buying none or alot less.Put the few you have up out of reach and site of them. Good Luck.

Nikki · 10-21-08, 09:59 AM

I can relate to what you are asking in so many ways.. It is hard to stand ground and do the tough love on whatever it is but the thing is you have to stand behind what you say NO.. The reason kids keep wanting what you say no to is because you always give in to them and they know how to get you to give in... Kids are smart, if they know they can throw a fit or show their attitude to get their way they will because they know you WILL eventually give in to what they want....As far as the snack thing, like Clare said put them away somewhere they cannot see them. Out of sight out of mind Now my kids are 17 and 14 the saying no to snacks is not an issue anymore lol it gets to be on keeping them home lol

Gary UK · 11-20-08, 03:38 AM

put a chart on the wall showing "treats for chores". hoovering the house = cookie, dusting = packet of chips...........that way you keep them busy and you get the housework done so you can sit with your feet up, glass of wine posting on here

jamin · 11-23-08, 07:26 PM

I don't know about junk food as a treat gary...what kind of message is that sending?
I like your concept, but I would much rather turn the reward into something like a movie.

Besides sis, you can always tell them they can call their uncle Jaime if they're good

Gary UK · 11-23-08, 07:32 PM

there is a little known concept it seems called..................humour!!!!! the suggestion was meant to bring a smile not as some accademical concept

jamin · 11-23-08, 08:44 PM

academical isn't a word
just thought i would throw that in there while we are having a laugh

Gary UK · 11-23-08, 08:57 PM

pedantic is though